Online dating rises in popularity despite risks
Lisa Kane and Iliana Deanda
Since the early 21st century, social networking sites like Myspace and Facebook have been emerging in cyberspace with more and more these days specifically designed for online dating. These types of sites offer free access to any adult or teenager around the world. Any user can join, create a free profile, and connect to interact with any other user.
“It seems like Myspace and Facebook began a whole new generation of dating activities and trouble,” said Shannon Ash, a 20-year-old student at MCC.
“It started out as ‘A Place for Friends’ and turned into a place for creepers, in my opinion.”
“Myspace was supposed to be something you specifically talked to your friends on, but instead I would get messages and comments from people I couldn’t even recognize hitting on me, and I don’t like that,” said Ash.
Websites designed for social networking have recently evolved into sites designed specifically for online dating where users explore profiles specifically to find a mate, and privacy is at the user’s discretion.
Alessa Gillette, 24, knows from personal experience just how these dating sites work.
“As a little experiment, my mom and I set up an account on eHarmony.com, just to see what reactions would be and what kind of feedback we would get,” said Gillette.
“I didn’t get much attention I think because the site just didn’t have people in my age group, but my mom was surprised at how many responses she got.”
eHarmony.com uses a compatibility matching system that takes 29 different personality variables and determines who you are most suitable to date.
“Cyber dating is a little different than normal first dates because you feel as though you know them. You know their favorite actors, authors and foods. You know everything they have told you, but they may not have been telling the truth,” said Gillette.
“The first thing you need to know is that everyone lies a little,” she added.
Women tend to lie about their weight or age, while men tend to lie about their income, level of baldness and athletic condition,” said Gillette. “The one thing you can count on is that everyone lies a little.”
Gillette and her mother discovered that it was all about the thrill of seeking, discovering and getting to know a person so openly and quickly.
Psychologist Susan Horton warns users of online social networking to take precautions.
“Online networks can be misleading for example, my nieces all lied because they were under the mistaken impression that they had to be over 18 to be on Myspace so they all made themselves older than they really were,” she said.
Horton believes it is easier to use these sites to network because of the time people have to perfect their choice of words and image.
“It is more likely that you could be misread meeting someone face to face for the first time,” she said.
“These sites greatly dimininish the trial and error process, but can also be misleading.”
People do not only use networking sites for companionship, but also for easy sex.
“The whole purpose of sites like Match.com is to not necessarily just to find a sexual partner,” Horton said.
“But when I ask my human sexuality classes where they would look if they were trying to find sex, they respond ‘bars, clubs, and online’.”
“When I asked them where they would go for a relationship they responded ‘church, work, or through friends,'” she said.
